I have to agree with the Lumina APV and the Eurovan standard with the diesel.
The lumina was fucking scary with the 3 speed auto too, trying to merge on the motorway was the scariest thing ever, especially if it downshifted, hitting redline and pretty much slowing down due to the total absence of torque and hp at any (but especailly at higher) rpm.
As for the Transporter, good god, what a painfulyl slow vehicle. 0-100 in 24h and the top speed of 114kph or so (max I ever reached anyway) while riding on redline at even slow motorway speeds, plus it burned through 5 gallons of oil per week and spewed out coolant everywhere. Terrible.